Property Point

One evening recently I noticed our family dog curled up next to my wife in a tight, protective ball, clearly scared and seeking protection from me and positioning herself as far away from me as she could get while remaining in the loungeroom.
This dog that I take running and play-fight with and pat and hug and spoil was scared of me and hiding behind my wife.
I said: “What’s wrong with Millie?”
My wife said: “You’re watching the footy.”
I’m an AFL person and a Sydney Swans fan and I was watching the first game of the year on a Thursday night against the Melbourne Football Club. I had high expectations, and still do, for the Bloods this year.
And as any sports fan knows (and I know it’s no different in rugby league), the way you speak, the volume of your voice, the apparent anger you display in the privacy of your own loungeroom when your team is playing can be somewhat different to the way you normally conduct yourself.
I reflected on what my dog would have witnessed: Me standing up from the couch, arms in the air, yelling, “Bull…. umpire, you friggin’ idiot!!”. Even my words of praise for my team were animated and shouted at the top of my voice; “Well done boys, stick it to ‘em!!”
I remember turning to my wife at one stage and angrily asking: “Why would that be a bloody free kick?”
Now I knew, and my wife knew, that I wasn’t blaming her for the poor umpiring decision and that it was a rhetorical question asked out of exasperation.
But my dog clearly hadn’t picked up on that nuanced, yet very important, detail.
I realised that all my dog knew was that this normally predictable, friendly member of the pack had suddenly gone rogue, apparently now a threatening, aggressive beast preparing to unleash all manner of ill-will on those around him.
She misinterpreted the situation.  But that wasn’t her fault, it was mine.
I was in a text exchange recently when the property buyer I had been talking to misinterpreted what I had said.
The buyer had texted me an offer in the high $500,000s on a property and I texted back, saying the seller was “looking for something in the $600,000s”.
The buyer texted an explanation for why her offer was at the price she had given. I was worried that she did not realise the offer was rejected. So I texted back, saying “Sorry, just to be clear, the seller has rejected your offer”.
Now I was only saying that because I wanted to make sure I had been clear. But the buyer misinterpreted the text and said: “There’s no need to be so rude.”
I apologized straight away and said I had not meant to be rude. But when I re-read the text I could see how she might feel that. We moved on very quickly and she ended up buying the property and during the process we became quite friendly and I really enjoyed working with her.
But the lesson for me was that texting doesn’t convey the emphasis or nuance of the spoken word.
If I had spoken to the buyer she would have picked up in the tone of my voice that I was not being rude, but quite apologetically clarifying that her offer had been rejected as I felt I had not been clear enough with my initial response.
It was a reminder to me that the important conversations must not be made via text or email. An agent needs to pick up the phone and convey things clearly, allowing tone of voice and emphasis to have their role in clear communication.
Meanwhile, Millie has taught me to calm down a bit during the footy and things seem a lot better for her. Although, she might become an outdoors dog during the September finals.

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