“I Thought That Was Normal…”

The symptoms many women quietly live with — and why they don’t have to

There are things many women quietly build into their daily routine.

Crossing your legs before you sneeze.

Choosing clothes carefully “just in case.”

Knowing exactly where the nearest bathroom is.

Avoiding jumping, running, or certain gym classes.

That heavy feeling by the end of the day.

Discomfort during intimacy.

For a lot of women, this becomes normal.

These changes often creep in slowly; after pregnancy, during the busy years of raising kids, around stressful work periods, or approaching menopause. Because they don’t happen overnight, and because no one really talks about them openly, many women assume it’s simply part of being a mum or getting older.

You’ll hear it said quietly at school pick-up or weekend sport:

“My bladder’s never been the same since kids.”

“I just don’t run anymore.”

“I thought that was normal.”

But here’s the key message: common doesn’t mean normal.

Many of these symptoms come from the pelvic floor muscles; a group of muscles that support the bladder and bowel, help control continence, and contribute to stability and movement. When they’re working well, you never think about them. When they’re not, everyday life becomes just that little bit harder.

This can look like:

• leaking urine when you cough, sneeze, laugh, or exercise
• rushing to the toilet and not quite making it
• waking overnight to urinate
• constipation or straining
• pelvic heaviness or dragging sensations
• pain with intimacy

These symptoms are very common and they’re also very treatable.

One reason women live with them for so long is timing. The contributing factors such as birth, heavy lifting, constipation, hormonal changes, or simply years of busy life, often happened long before the symptoms appear. By then, it no longer feels connected.

So women adapt. They wear pads, stop certain exercises, or plan their day around bathrooms. These strategies help in the short term, but they don’t address the underlying issue.

The encouraging news is pelvic floor conditions respond well to appropriate assessment and rehabilitation. Treatment isn’t just “do your Kegels.” It’s individualised, evidence-based care that looks at how your muscles function and what your body needs. Many women notice significant improvements in confidence, comfort, and return to activities they had quietly given up.

One of the most common things I hear in clinic is:

“I wish I’d come sooner.”

Your body isn’t letting you down, it’s communicating.

If any of this sounds familiar, it may be worth having a conversation with a qualified pelvic health physiotherapist. Early support often means easier recovery and a quicker return to the things you enjoy.

Because being able to laugh, exercise, sleep comfortably, and move with confidence shouldn’t feel like a luxury — it should be expected at every stage of life.

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