Ringing The Bell

There’s a moment in every cancer journey when survival becomes more than just about living—it’s about enduring the pain, the fear, and the uncertainty. For me, those moments came to an end with the last chemotherapy session, the last dose of Oxaliplatin running through my veins. It was the moment I’d fought for. The moment I’d been working toward through every tear, every side effect, every sleepless night.
When I first heard the words, “It’s cancer,” the world seemed to pause. I felt like I was caught in a suspended moment, overwhelmed with questions. How bad was it? How long did I have? What happens now? I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think. For me, the fear was like standing at the edge of a vast, unknown ocean, feeling the pull of the tide with no clear path to land.
The journey was not just about the physical battle—it was the mental and emotional weight that came with it. There were moments of deep fear and uncertainty, where the future seemed like a blurry fog, and I wondered if I could make it through. It wasn’t always about pushing through the pain or nausea; it was about facing each day with the knowledge that I had to keep going, even when every part of me wanted to stop. I never liked the ‘brave’ tag and didn’t think it was about being fearless; it was about moving forward despite the fear and finding the courage to keep hoping that I wouldn’t leave my little boy without his Mumma.
When my oncologist told me that the PET scan showed no signs of cancer, there were no words, just tears. I cried for everything I had been through, for the relief, for the fear that was finally gone. Then, when the infusion pump beeped, signalling the end of my treatment, the tears came again. It was relief, the weight of it all, finally lifting.
Then, there was the bell, the sound I continually told myself I wanted to hear.
I stepped forward, took hold of the bell, and rang it.
Once, to bring hope to the future.
Twice, to thank all who walk this path with me.
Three times, to remember all those on this journey, past, present and future.
I want to extend my deepest thanks to everyone at Mackay Base Hospital—the incredible oncologists, surgeons, nurses, and the oncology team whom I came to know so well. Your professionalism, expertise and care made all the difference during my darkest days.
Though there’s still a road ahead, both physically and emotionally, I can finally say: I’m here and I’m moving forward.
I rang that bell to embrace the future that I fought so hard to keep.
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Amanda

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